Article Thumbnail

You Should Be Grateful Your Girl Washes Her Vulva in Your Bathroom Before Sex

We’re not using your old Nike socks like a new meme implies, but yeah, every now and then, we freshen up with whatever soap you’ve got lying around. And if it makes us smell like pomegranate Dial, so be it

Pussy can smell like a lot of things. I don’t need to list them out for you. But according to one set of memes, it often smells like a particular object: whatever hand soap you have atop your bathroom sink. 

As the trope goes, some women are washing themselves with hand soap in the bathroom of a hookup’s house before intimacy ensues. A rendition going around this week shows a crude drawing of a woman with one leg propped up on the sink, scrubbing herself with a photoshopped-in Nike sock and pomegranate Dial hand soap. The drawing is a familiar feature of these memes, seemingly designed to describe this exact scenario. 

The Nike sock and the specific hand soap, however, are new inclusions. They’re referencing a viral screenshotted set of text messages of a guy texting one of his friends about how a woman came over to his house and washed herself in his bathroom with the duo. “Why this bitch come over last night n washed her pussy wit the handsoap and my fucking Nike sock bro,” the message begins. “Slept in my bed the whole night knowing she balled my sock up and put it under my sink. As soon as she took them panties off I instantly smelled pomegranate.”

Why the sock had to be involved in this scenario is something I cannot explain. A hand towel would have been a better choice, or even toilet paper — whoever this woman is, she went rogue. That said, women aren’t collectively washing themselves with socks. Apparently, though, the hand soap thing is real. When one meme about it was posted on the subreddit r/NotHowGirlsWork, many women admitted that they do actually do this. “Uhhh… this is exactly how girls work,” one said. “I’ve done that,” admitted another. “But isn’t that common courtesy? To get cleaned up when you’re a little sweaty?”

Frankly, she’s right — it is common courtesy! Anyone should be glad for clean genitals before sex, and sock notwithstanding, men should be grateful. Proud of themselves, even. While it’s really nothing more than a sign that a woman is concerned about how she tastes or smells at the moment, it could also indicate two other possibilities. The first is that you hit her up on short notice and she decided she did want to fuck despite not having time to shower. The second is that she decided to meet up with you, but thought she wouldn’t want to have sex and therefore didn’t prepare ahead of time. Luckily for you, she changed her mind and wants to scramble to make herself presentable for you. Regardless, bow down. 

As I mentioned, pussy can smell like a lot of things. Hand soap is obviously one of the milder possibilities, and really not that much of an inconvenience. That said, fragranced, antibacterial soaps are notably not great for vulvas, and can trigger infections and irritation in some. So you should be doubly grateful that she’d take that risk for you. Men should honestly do the same thing! 

The sock guy is right to be disturbed by his scenario, but others should be a liiiiiiittle more tactful here (this includes making sure your bathroom has washcloths and toilet paper so she doesn’t have to reach for your socks). Do you wanna have sex with the woman or not? Grow up and keep the fact that you recognize the Mrs. Meyer’s Clean Day Lemon Verbena scent to yourself.